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Thought Process: Morning Coffee

October 30, 2015

Is it really time to abandon the covers? I have an unopened pint of Stumptown Winter Cheer Cold Brew with Milk and Mulling Spices in the fridge, which I’m thinking could be enough to lure me out of bed. It promises the chocolately brew that’s my absolute favorite in summer, now spiked with cloves and cinnamon and allspice. I’m hoping that it will be like my own private pumpkin spice latte, minus the cloying sweetness and social stigma.

But said coffee is, as the name suggests, cold. Stumptown’s web copy likens sipping it to “a swim in a snowglobe.” WHO IN HER RIGHT MIND WANTS TO SWIM IN A SNOWGLOBE?

Ooooh, mixed with rum, perhaps? Breakfast drink of champions! But that would entail locating the rum while in my current chilly, non-caffeinated state. Microwave it? Expeditious but crass. And forget about brewing and infusing my own.

This is a veritable Rubik’s Cube of beverage selection.

Our electric heater kicks on, inducing a Cirque du Soleil of Dust Bunnies. Our leaky aluminum windows fog and drip and fog again. I know Jules wants to wait until November 1 to begin our futile resistance against the dampness that will make us feel like we are camping outside all winter.

A foggy window in Seattle town

Battling water with water and soaking in a scalding-hot tub will be my only relief. Oooh … iced coffee and rum IN THE BATH?

He might as well surrender, you know. QVC has been selling cozy and cheer and autodelivery butter croissants and pre-lit everything all year, but the pace has really quickened of late. Last night, they nearly convinced me that a mix of purple and blue LED firefly lights would spruce up our little winter campsite quite nicely.

buy my trees!

Back to bed, then.

:: 45 minutes later ::

The Stumptown cold brew contains milk, which means that I can use it as creamer for hot coffee! Yaaaaaaasssssss!




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